To have it all

Despite claiming to be a progressive society, we haven’t yet freed ourselves from the noose of orthodoxy and out-dated customs that were firmly tied to us since time immoral. From dowry practices to forcing women to be stay-at-home wives, patriarchy continues to be the core of our DNA the reason why this strange reason behind an impending high-profile didn’t take me by surprise. For what I can call the totally misogynistic and sophomoric reason, a filmmaker is all set to part ways with his actress wife, since his parents are vehemently against the thriving career of his wife, and wants her to be the typical pallu-clad, doormat-like partner with zero self-identity. Paying obeisance to the patriarchal mind-set, a channel even aired an ‘exclusive’ conversation with his dad who never shied away from hurling the entire blame on his ‘ambitious’ daughter-in-law.

What kind of forward-thinking society are we claiming to be living in, where someone guiltlessly walkout of his blissful marital life just because his wife is harmlessly ambitious and longs to have a stable career of her own? The incident, with the many unaccounted others, only goes to reaffirm repeatedly that nothing has dethroned the sense of authoritarianism and brashness that several men continue to brazenly carry with pride. It also reminds me of the audacity of a supposedly prospective groom whom my parents choose for me from a matrimonial website. A pot-bellied agricultural officer who was nearly 7-8 years elder to me back then, and more than evidently old-fashioned, he expressed his inherent and infuriatingly regressive outlook at the very first sight by asking me if I would bid goodbye to my stable writing career if he expresses his ‘willingness’ to marry me. Not wasting a second to pamper his boorishness, I quickly yet politely expressed the denial loud and clear, while struggling to hide my anger and humiliation for having wasted an hour of my precious time to meet a narrow-minded chauvinist. I was desperate to shun his fatuity and end the conversation right away.


Marriage is undoubtedly an important milestone, but not the ultimate aim for living, the reason why this obstinacy to make women sacrifice their career at the marriage altar is a preposterous practice that I am yet to comprehended. A happy household is unquestionably a bliss that every woman would want to have, and I am no different. But this should never come with relentless persecution for having chosen a thriving career. Running a home in clockwork precision is not just the responsibility of women alone, and women needn’t relinquish her career aspirations and forcefully domesticate themselves to become the perfect wife and a perfect mother that the world wants her to be.

Marriage and motherhood are the most precious phases that no woman would want to give up on. But we never get to see them coming in the way of successful men. For most women these milestones are mostly followed by the abrupt ending of their careers and ambitions. While this can be argued as a matter of choice, the fact is there is no choice at all, other than giving up jobs and career to "settle down" as per societal norms. No programs on educating and empowering girls and women will succeed in our country unless there's a serious change in the mind-set. It’s high time to debunk the age-old notion of stereotypical gender roles. The contributions should be equal, and so should be the sacrifices. If this turns out impracticable, like women, men too can stay at home and be the caregivers while women become breadwinners. In other words, a change in roles should become totally acceptable and normal. Don’t you think so?

PS – If a couple dares to reverse the accepted roles within a marriage, will a man easily survive the ridicule, insecurities, and scorns our boorish society, to remain as a stay-at-home spouse and support his wife wholeheartedly? I really doubt.

Double standards

Hardly a day goes by without having to deal with sardonic comments on my unconventional looks, large forehead, and unfashionable attires. Despite having a handful of achievements to boast of, the world is engrossed in my looks and marital status; an annoying obsession which I have a problem with. It’s akin to dealing with an invisible yet omnipresent enemy. Am I the only woman who has to deal with this distasteful judgment? Absolutely not!

One among the most popular business journalists in the country, she has won several accolades and has umpteen achievements to her credit. Yet, I happened to see a sexiest piece of writing that treated her and nine other renowned journalists like mere ‘window dressings’ in the world of visual media. Titled Hottest Female Journalists, the article is nothing but a disgraceful re-count that disparages the stupendous achievements of these highly admired journalists. From makeup to attire, the article has everything trivial, celebrating their appearances, and paying scant attention to what they have achieved over the years. The cheesy piece of writing only accentuated the fact that inherent patriarchal attitudes still run deep and are expressed vividly through such shallow, mean, and highly demeaning judgments.

This discrimination rarely happens to men, who are judged on their achievements and talents alone. The oddity doesn’t end here, as I still haven’t deciphered the reason behind usages such as female-journalist, female-doctor, female-lawyer, and so on. While gender names are unalterably glued in case of women professionals, why does the mandate fly out of the window when men work in these respective positions? Objectification, misogyny, and bigotry don’t happen with journalists, doctors, or lawyers alone. They have become part and parcel of our day-to-day life. Regardless of having several activists who are constantly vocal about getting rid of sexism at workplaces, or society in general, gender-based marginalization is still dominant, and often wriggles out in the forms of meanest categorizations and offensive remarks. It’s high time we get rid of the unhealthy fixation to judge women on what they wear and how they look. In spite of being regarded as remarkably progressive, in today’s world, a woman’s hairstyle, attire, or other arbitrary external factors sadly play key roles in building people’s perception about her overall personality. In other words, a woman’s short skirt or red lipstick overshadows years of hard work and remarkable achievements.

From wardrobes to wardrobe-malfunctions, and from weight gain to weight loss mantras and Botox treatments, several glossy magazines thrive on the gossipy articles that objectify women. Advertisements too are no different, and constantly have their cameras panned on bodily features of skimpily clad women, rather than subtly and creatively conveying their messages. This undoubtedly increases the obsession with women’s looks. Every objectifying gaze on TV soon extends to real-life, wherein men are keener on judging women only by their physical appearance, and not by their talents. This disheartening, unhealthy, and absurd objectification comes with several ramifications, including labeling women as less competent than men. No matter how big an achiever a woman is, rarely do we see the world talking about her successes. But much to our shock and disappointment, everyone will have countless opinions on her appearance. While some are prudent enough to keep it to themselves, some others imprudently express it publically.

That said, given the way several women literally go berserk to comply with the long-patronized stereotypical benchmarks of the society, men alone needn’t be blamed snarky judgments and stark objectifications. The pressure of looking good should never overpower a woman’s self-identity, or infuse a sense of sheer worthlessness due to lack of right makeup, curvy figure, or flashy apparel. Women should stop falling prey to unwarranted self-consciousness, and embrace the sense of completeness in being as natural as possible. Makeup and trendy apparel undoubtedly enhances ones appearance, but should never be considered as a convenient drape to conceal negativity and low self-esteem. Adding to this is imminent need to get rid of the muckraking attitude that some derisive women are ‘infested’ with. While they are quick to judge other women on their looks, most of them would find their confidence crumbling down upon receiving the same remarks in return.

There is so much more about women achievers than the way they look like. Yet, most of them are either judged based on their looks, or written off as boring and bookish. When will our apparently progressive society get rid of this deep-rooted discrimination and pervasive misogyny?

Soul-sucking ‘entertainments’

Despite sitting in the secure and cosy hostel room, and knowing that the visuals on my laptop are way far from reality, the trailer of this soon-to-be released movie on a serial killer, and the gory acts of horror depicted in it, did make me sick to my stomach. Call it the brilliance behind a well-crafted story line, the incomparable talent of the actor who essayed the protagonist’s role, or the ingenious usage of advanced special effects and top-notch technologies, the images were deeply disturbing in so many levels. Are such movies worth seeing the light of the day? The answer depends on the extent of audiences who love watching such gory portrayals.

On-screen gores of several recent movies that illustrate mind-numbing murder mysteries and slaughtering are often so close to extreme ghastliness and obscenity. Viewers are often made to wonder how on earth such inarguably disturbing scenes receive the seal of approval from the censoring authorities. While movies are fundamentally a source of entertainment, such brutally and violent portrayals never serve even an iota of amusement. Instead the disturbing visuals dive deep into the psyche of several viewers and drive them to extreme sadness and depression, or elicit madness and human depravity in extreme situations.

Lately, there are a whole bunch of both novice and veteran filmmakers who religiously cling on to the misconception that films that are subversive and filled to the brim with extreme violence of various forms are both enthralling and adrenaline-pumping. In other words, many futile attempts to make adrenaline-charging psychological thrillers often ends up with stark packages of explicit dialogues, mindless violence, dark protagonists, and gory bloodbaths. This disturbing approach of displaying everything grossest from necrophilia to incest or sexual violence, dismemberment makes me wonder what why movie makers jump into the presumption that audiences would find such grossest visuals amusing and enjoyable.

When it comes to depicting real-life incidents that have left us aghast and numb, none of us might want to be on the denial mode about the depth of cruelty and in-humaneness that have left us flabbergasted. But an on-screen depiction of such real incidents demand toned-down and tamed narrative approaches that aren’t bleak, bizarre and unnerving. Depressing, haunting, and horrifying narrations can never be bailed out for being straightforward and honest portrayals. While realistic narrations are indispensable, the brilliance in the making of murder mystery, horror, and thriller movies is not limited to making gratuitously violent visuals alone, instead they have to unfold through subtle portrayals that are watchable and easy on our minds. The stories have to be chronicled in a more fine-tuned and viewable manner that majority or viewers would love to watch.

Aversion to nauseating flicks are often regarded as one’s inability to rise above the childish scare. Such subtle mocks and undertones are what we often hear from friends and families who never think twice to call someone fain-hearted for being aversive towards gory visuals. However, as one gears up to watch a gruesome flick that chronicles a series of utmost horrific adventures, little do we know the devastating impacts the movie might leave on the viewer. Filmmakers across the world have to come into terms with the fact that such loathsome movies will only leave the audiences freaked, rather than entertaining them. Giving an edge of the seat experience can never be attributed to portraying disgustingly inhuman acts that no one would pleasurably watch.

Censoring has been widely debated around the world, and a whole host of filmmakers vehemently oppose the idea of censorship, as they believe the ‘cuts’ made might smother the ‘message’ to be delivered through the movie. However, this absolute freedom cannot be exploited for infusing explicit and violent depictions. The impact of such gory adaptations will only dwarf the aesthetic aspect of the movie, along with doing more harm than good to the viewers as well as the society as a whole.

Where will we get water from?

Every problem has a solution, but when it comes to dealing with water crisis, despite knowing every simple and practical solution available, this growing predicament is overlooked year after year. The result of this constant laxity is evident in many parts of the country, where the once-fertile lands have become dry and barren due to acute water shortage. Adding to this, both sweltering summer and water levels of reservoirs plummeting to historic lows have arisen some alarming questions on water security. Given the unpredictability of seasons, a delayed monsoon will only make matters worse and spell more trouble for many parts of the country. Here are some stark statistical evidences to shed more light on the alarming levels of water crisis - While you leave those faucets dripping, take a bit more time under the shower, or pour out the unused water a mineral water bottle, one among nine people around survive on unclean water, and nearly 3.4 million die every year from waterborne diseases. Our population continues to soar each day, but that increase has not been matched by a concurrent increase in fresh water supply.

The visual depiction of a village belle with a metal pitcher filled with water balanced on her head no more incites a romantic inspiration. Instead, with alarming levels of water scarcity, this image is the poignant indication of the country’s growing water crisis, especially during those scorching summer months when temperatures soar. Gone are the days when farmers’ suicides from a drought-affected village would hit headlines, trigger heated debates, force authorities to jump into action. With growing number of political scams and scandals that rock the country every single day, plight of farmers never make it to the local or national news.

The hard-hitting impacts of water crisis are not limited to the health and economic perils alone. The implications are far beyond agricultural and industrial woes. One among the many manifestations of water scarcity is the extraordinary tradition of polygamy that’s been practiced in numerous drought-hit villages. Several men from drought-stricken areas marry multiple times and saddle women with the taxing duty of fetching water from far-off places. In a country that prohibits polygamy by law and promotes women empowerment through endless much-publicized schemes, these unlawful marital arrangements are never resisted due to acute water shortage. Irrespective of being denied of any marital rights, these ‘paaniwaali bais’ continue their arduous routine every day, making repeated treks to nearby ponds, rivers, or dams to collect water. Such day-to-day gruelling walks take the worst toll on their health in no time. They soon go bald and often suffer from neck and spinal injuries

Despite knowing that the impacts of brutal summer has left many families devastated, no long-term plan has been devised by-far, and no sufficient measures have been taken to deal with the disaster. Adding to this shocking negligence and callous attitude is the gross misuse of water for making of helipads and cricket pitches, which indicates the alarming fact that not far is the day when a water riot might erupt at any part of the country. Though ‘water express’ trains are undoubtedly a commendable effort to supply quality drinking water to drought-hit areas, the need of the hour is not quick-fixes but long term solutions that help solve this staggering woe successfully. Securing water availability should not be limited to relying solely on dams, rivers, or bore-wells, but has to extend further with implementation of effective water saving and storage measures that prevent rapid depletion of ground water levels. However, other than, going gaga over rain water harvesting and desalination technologies that help store water, no significant efforts have been taken device and deploy such measures, or to clean and preserve polluted and dwindling water resources.

While several villages are reeling under acute drought and water shortage, Hiware Bazar, a village in Maharashtra, is a shining example of how proactive and sustainable efforts can help overcome water crisis. Thanks to the persistent efforts of the sarpanch, the villagers have never experienced water shortage in the last two decades. If Hiware Bazar can become an oasis amid parched villages, why can’t others follow the footsteps? Never dawdle; start saving and recycling every drop of water, or else, there will be nothing left to save.

Hatred, hatred everywhere!

Being active on social media was never a menace until I received that derisive message from a strange account. Shocked and distressed by those gross and insensitive words, I bid goodbye to the social media platform where I could easily voice my opinions without worrying about being politically correct. Lately, social media debates have stooped to a new low with some of the cruelest trolls from morons who insult and dare everyone who dares to dissent. They conveniently hide in the dark spaces of the web and constantly unleash their inane wrath and fury. They lack real names or identities, but insults are real, and are often laced with lewd slurs. Such virtual mudslingings are not only hurting and disturbing, but are extremely sickening to the gut. How long can one patiently ignore and defy the endless troll wraths?

Rather than focusing on sharing genuine opinions, people are now keener on spurting venomous abuses behind the anonymity of their accounts. Surprisingly most of them, in all probably, are regular users, and never get caught for their shocking audacity. Despite being successful in providing an interactive platform, many social networking platforms are unable to curb these staggering levels of abusive and offensive rants that are posted from strangely-named and anonymous accounts. As victims around the world continue to wonder how to battle against this vulgarity and viciousness that spreads so freely, it’s sad that social media companies are constantly failing to acknowledge the impacts of such tormenting and slandering remarks. The ramifications can be so devastating that many might end up taking their lives after constantly failing to cope up with mounting levels of harassments and trolling.

No policies, filters, and tools that are currently available are completely successful in dealing with this vulnerability, the reason why many users are continually imploring for better and long-standing solutions that help avoid vitriolic online attacks. At times, situations can be so dire and annoying that such messages might extend beyond physical and mental abuses to spreading nasty rumors, engaging in endless bickering, or posting violent threats. While everyone is entitled to speak their own minds and hold their own opinions, and there’s no reason for people to be sadistic and mean. The freedom to garb oneself in anonymity is the main reason behind the rising number of disruptive users and outrageous behaviors on social media. Originally, spammers where the prime reason for peskiness, but lately, trolls have replaced them by persistently posting hateful and abusive messages, and targeting the well-know, the less-known, as well as the unknown equally. Thus the benefits of social media continue to get constantly challenged and totally usurped by such bullies who constantly engage in pervasive abusing. Following every hacking or online shaming, both critics and social media companies often jump in and blame the victims for being lackadaisical. This lack of accountability emphasizes the fact that social media will continue to remain unsafe for many of us. Or, there will be no end to this growing toxicity, the reason why many eminent personalities have voluntarily started quitting social media due to the rising proliferations of harassments and hostility.

Ugly, abusive, violent, and often sexual, online harassments and abuse are never easy to deal with. It’s high time to stop this merciless public lynching. The need of the hour is a zero-tolerance policy, as well as useful, and simple solutions that help combat online abuses. Reducing the anonymity is imminent, as it might help unmask several veiled harassers who screech vile abuses, post explicit images, and write crude remarks that wreck the lives of many who get victimized for no reason.

Celebrating entrepreneurship

Despite being immensely rewarding, the road to becoming a successful entrepreneur is not an easy one to traverse. For lack infrastructure or insufficiency of funds, the strides to transforming lives, creating rewarding jobs, and building a stable economy can be hindered at various steps, in turn evoking a strong sense of failure and dispiritedness. However, fervent entrepreneurs outlive such fleeting disappointments and strive hard all over again. Young Turks on CNBC-TV18 is the longest running TV show that features such accomplished entrepreneurs and their game-changing business ideas. Rather than being another cookie-cutter show with hardly anything novel to contribute, every episode of Young Turks stands out and remarkably narrates the inspiring journeys of zealous entrepreneurs who enjoy admirable achievements in their chosen business genres.

While present-day business shows channelize lion’s share of their attention on inherited and well-known businesses, Young Turks raises the bar of excellence by recounting several inspiring start-up stories from all over the country. With no repetitiveness and lacklustre content, Young Turks is a genuine effort to inspire the entrepreneurial mind-sets of several aspiring business owners. When it comes to taking baby steps towards setting up a successful business venture, getting an intimate understanding of the chosen business sector is indispensable. Young Turks features businesses from all major categories, thus playing key role in boosting the entrepreneurial ecosystem in the country. Apart from the parent show, the team has been a significant part of several laudable initiatives like TiE the Knot, thus promoting youth entrepreneurship in the country. No prize for guessing why the DIPP secretary Mr. Amitabh Kant referred Young Turks as “one of the most energizing and vibrant” program on television.

On Young Turks, every proven entrepreneurial venture is showcased in the most admirably unique and engaging manner, thus letting the entrepreneurial spirit of many thrive and prosper by leaps and bounds. By letting the bookish business concepts and methodologies take the backseat, the show keenly promotes and boosts novel and time- tested practical business ideas. This ground-breaking approach to promote viable entrepreneurship is an imminent need as well as a transformational and imperative step towards initiating creativity and innovation in entrepreneurship, thus replacing the conventional paradigms with more practicable alternatives. When every other television show on entrepreneurship is limited to predictable conversations and hypothetical theories, Young Turks is way ahead in their commitment towards instilling newer refreshing ideas on entrepreneurship. With regular mentoring to advice, guide, and recognise success in entrepreneurship, Young Turks continues to foster transformational breakthroughs in entrepreneurship.

Though entrepreneurs effortlessly flaunt their success stories, when it comes to admitting missteps in business, not many entrepreneurs willingly disclose them openly. However, those at the helm of the start-ups and thriving businesses that are featured on Young Turks honestly narrate both their failures and successes, thus sharing some of the most crucial pragmatic lessons in entrepreneurship and leadership, particularly those which are indispensable to thrive in adversities and difficult economic conditions. These never-to-be-missed learning opportunities cannot be found on any other TV series on entrepreneurs and start-ups.

As Make in India, PM’s flagship campaign, is taking the world by storm, Young Turks has been actively contributing several creative and leading-edge business ideas to translate this vision into a success. Such commendable and sustained efforts will go a long way toward accelerating the growth and progress of the country along with boosting competiveness and productivity in business, while stressing the necessity to avoid bottlenecks that impede innovation and entrepreneurship. In short the Young Turks Make in India events never fail to provide the right platform to learn, communicate, collaborate, and share the best practices for lasting success in the fast-paced and fiercely competitive world of entrepreneurship.

Breaking away from conventional concepts of making a TV series on entrepreneurship, Young Turks has been inspiring and empowering the business world for more than a decade, along with elevating the benchmarks of successful entrepreneurship to newer heights. The incredible efforts to nurture the future business leaders of the country team undoubtedly deserve a mention. The Young Turks book with several inspiring insights and anecdotes is another worth mentioning effort that emphasizes the team’s enduring commitment towards promoting entrepreneurship and business innovation.

Do you have a novel idea to make the world a more sustainable place? Watch Young Turks and get inspired to become an innovator!

Show – Young Turks
Channel - CNBC-TV18
Timings - Sat: 11:00 am & 7:30 pm, Sun: 12 noon

Being contented

Contentment in life; despite being a frequently used idiom, the perspective of a gratified life varies. In other words, the meaning of a satisfied life is not the same for each one of us.  While some are keen on attaining gratification with what they have in hand, some others are insatiable, especially when it comes to material pleasures. They believe in finding contentment by chasing for more riches. Despite being significantly reasonable in their views, it’s undoubtedly true that those who attain real fulfillment are the ones who unearth happiness with what they have.

Ambition is a prized trait, while constant failure to enjoy what’s in hand will drive one crazy. At times, fulfilled with what’s around is termed apathetic. In other words, ambition and fulfillment in life are very often associated in the wrong manner. Unmitigated determination and perseverance to excel are obviously the right catalysts to succeed. However, as the crave runoffs the optimal level, it transforms into an ever-prevalent sense of strong disappointment and despair. Irrespective of having sizable achievements to boast of, such people hardly attain happiness in their life, and continue to wearily chase more worldly desires.

The thin and blurry line between ambition and achievement is to be blamed for this confusion and stumble that most people experience in their life.  Nurturing a strong desire to succeed, or harnessing one’s entire potential, can be regarded as the right steps towards triumphing over the odds.  However, this pursuit takes the wrong deviation when the resultant gain is less than what’s anticipated. Anticipation or the ever-mounting level of desires is too strong to shorten even the mightiest of the achievements, replacing the feeling of being victorious with a crippled sense of failure and dissatisfaction. In other words, the achievement gets garbed in the intense feeling of disappointment and gloom.

The best and most effective way to combat this negativity is to learn to be fully contented with what’s in hand; to be at peace with what has been achieved.  Such a strong and positive stance bridges the extremities between one’s ambitions and attainments in life, without weakening the motivation to strive for excellence against all the adversities. It also helps create the constructive sense of a well-lived life.

A large desire is never to be blamed as none of us are good at carrying diminutive wishes. That said, as the gap between the list of wishes and attainments widen, there grows a sense of losing out. This is the disconnection that’s to be taken care of, as it destroys the entire sense of contentment in life.  In other words, an overpowering sense of disappointment and apathy lessens the serenity of life.  A strong balance between both ambition and achievement is where fulfillment lies.  Being realistic in ambitions and desires is the best way to get out of the mismatch.  Aspirations grow appropriately when one carries a strong sense of strengths, limitations, and humaneness. This critical step is indispensable to unleash the power of contentment in life.

The day that should never have dawned

Can emotional bullying be as devastating and intense as physical abuse? This first-hand narrative will help arrive at a clear and logical answer. It was a day I wish had never happened.

Being meticulous at every step of my life, I was not lackadaisical about shifting to a new hostel for a month. However, despite informing in advance about my arrival, a long and frustrating wait awaited me, as the mammoth gates of the building remained unopened. After a series of repeated calls, the landlady sheepishly opened the gates with a lame excuse that she had overslept and failed to remember to keep the gate opened. Though a tinge of discontent flared up deep inside my stomach, I rubbished it off and walked inside to handover the rent, before occupying the space that I was allotted to. As I walked inside, I had the least idea of what awaited me. Though I hardly expected any welcoming gestures and smiling faces, the teeming anger, sarcasm, and mockery of a group of snooty women welcomed me to my new abode. Their body language and histrionics made it very evident that I would remain as an unexpected, un-welcomed, despised, and snubbed inmate during my month long stay. Though it was a sign of caution, I chose to overlook it as the immaturity of a bunch of women who are perplexed at the thought of losing the privacy they had been enjoying until then.

Next sign of obvious protest came in as the disagreement to share the cupboard, although I was allotted ample space to arrange my bags. Much to my shock and disbelief, I found smelly clothes and dirty wrappers stuffed inside the cupboard which was totally empty the previous day. As I patiently cleaning the space, the inmates chose to stay away and ganged up in a room close by. The trouble was far from over. Tired and hungry, I was getting ready to reach the office on time, but felt a tantalizing aroma from the kitchen. As I walked in, the inmates were hurriedly leaving after a scrumptious breakfast. Without expressing the dissent of not being told, I had the breakfast and packed my lunch for the day. Though I was surrounded my scornful eyes, spiteful yet unclear comments, and sarcasm-filled smiles, I was too patient to ignore them. I left for work with a heavy heart, wondering what more was in store.

Come evening and I walked back with an unbearable sinusitis headache, hoping for ample rest and sleep after a stressful day. The bed I was allotted to was cleverly preoccupied by an inmate who had messily left her books, laptops, and cell phone chargers on it. As the landlady paid no heed to my repeated requests to get the space vacated, I politely request the inmate to remove her belongings so that I can sleep peacefully. Although she removed everything while expressing her annoyance noticeably, once again I patiently chose to ignore the snootiness and tried my best to relax. But the worst was yet to come

As the inmates reached one after the other derisively laughing at me, a strong sense of hurtfulness and sickness grew deep inside. Though annoying and insulting antiques was what I received every minute, a resilient quietness was my reply, which annoyed them further. Soon the lights were all switched on and the room was lit like a stadium, music was played, and hullabaloos reached its peak. I confined to my bed, repeatedly begging them to let me sleep. My requests were unanswered and my illness turned out to be a matter of laughter for the entire girl gang who had a gala time throughout the evening. As the landlady walked in by 10.pm to lock the doors, my patience was at its last ebb. After giving a piece of my mind to the lot, I was all set to leave the place at night, but was requested by the landlady to stay back until the next morning.

Amid all the chaos, the landlady unknowingly spurted out that I was the victim of an unreasonable animosity of the girls who have always been vehemently against the idea of welcoming a new inmate.

Early the next day, I quit the place.

The ‘moral’ lens

With innumerable innovations in medical technologies, we’re well past the age where gynecological diseases were a matter of immense concern and scare. No such diseases are undetectable these days, not even the ones that are spotted in fallopian tube, ovary, uterus, vagina, or vulva. However, despite the ground-breaking medical advancements, the age-old stigma around visiting a gynecologist still continue to linger around in our society, stopping several single and unwed women from receiving timely medical aids to diagnose grave health disorders such as gynecological cancer. While both leading hospitals and well-known clinics have expert gynecologists who can easily diagnose the causes and symptoms of commonly detected gynecological diseases, many single women refrain from getting the experts’ aid fearing the societal and moral repercussions associated with visiting a gynecologist. No matter how developed our country is, the sight of unmarried women at gynecologists’ office is often linked to sexual promiscuity and pregnancy. This much prevalent misconception very often cost the lives of many women who fail to leverage the potential lifesaving medical aids and expert advices that are currently available. Regardless of all the developments that we boast about, no efforts are taken to eradicate this ever-growing insularity and lack of knowledge. Though both married and unmarried women can suffer the same health problems, for fear of taunts and sneers, the latter fails to get timely treatments and medical care. This preconceived notion is evidently prevalent among all among all societal sectors, the reason why several single women choose to close the eyes to the initial signs of many gynecological disorders that can turn out fatal later on.

Furthermore, facing the moral judgments that drip down from the disgusting questions or the repugnant lecture on ‘morality’ is no less than an embarrassing ordeal. Fear of such humiliating experiences makes women take a step back and unknowingly invite more health woes. At times, medics too are no different from taunting, lecturing on conventional morality, or denying medical support for single or unmarried women. While getting clarity on medical and sexual related issues are crucial to avoid misdiagnosis, problems arise when medical examination gets side-tracked to morality lessons and shaming of patients. It’s high time to support single and unmarried women open up and share their concerns around gynecological health, the diagnosis of which should never be hindered by the bigoted comments on promiscuity and morality. In simple terms, both the judgmental society and the bigoted medics out there should apprehend the fact that pregnancy and sexual illnesses are not the only reasons why women seek gynecological aid.