Take it with a grain of salt

My take on Glassdoor reviews

When we need help to find a good restaurant or pick out a new book or a smartphone, what do we do? Turn to customer reviews, of course! But when it comes to making employment decisions, is it a good idea to make decisions based on company reviews? Should sites like Glassdoor fit into or become an integral part of our job hunt? I don't think so.

Before diving into the details, here is a caveat: I am not saying that Glassdoor reviews are not useful at all. But, while making a career decision, one should not rely heavily on the reviews posted anonymously. Let me tell you why - Any disgruntled employee can hide behind a screen and easily target and tarnish a company's reputation by venting all the anger and frustration and by writing all the negative things possible.

On the other hand, if companies encourage or force employees to leave only positive reviews,  it is almost impossible to get the accurate inside information that can guide your decision. And, if someone has a personal vendetta against a manager or another employee, the avenue they can easily take advantage of to pour out their anger and vengeance is Glassdoor. If you notice carefully, when it comes to the credibility of the reviewers and the accuracy of the claims and statements made by each reviewer, Glassdoor doesn't take any responsibility.

Then why is Glassdoor so important? While researching for the next potential employer, Glassdoor is the go-to platform and primary source for you, me, and many other people out there. With less potent competitors like AmbitionBox and Indeed, they don't face any significant market competition. But most of the reviews on Glassdoor are about extreme feelings - either good or bad. The claims often look too impulsive and exaggerated. Generally, the larger the data, the more accurate the information.  But for me, this rule doesn't apply to Glassdoor reviews.

Either you can find a flood of positive reviews or an avalanche of negative reviews where reviewers rant and vent their frustration and spew negative opinions in front of a group of vulnerable audience who often get swayed and misled easily.

If the reviews sound too good to be true or if the number is disproportionately positive, I don't trust them at all. And, if multiple posts include the same points written in noticeably similar ways, that's an obvious red flag.  For me, both are equally undependable. No matter which website I go through, I always trust those reviews with an even-handed approach. Unfortunately, these days, you cannot say both Glassdoor and neutral reviews in the same breath.

Here is another reason why I don't rely much on Glassdoor reviews - As far as I know, Glassdoor doesn't have any transparent methods to identify the reviews that left by choice and remove the fake ones or those with vested interests. It means anyone can post reviews on Glassdoor, about any company, at any point in time, with hardly any credible verification. And, there is nothing that stops a reviewer from posting multiple reviews from different ids. Does that mean one shouldn't trust Glassdoor reviews? I won't say that.  Instead, I leave that decision to your own best judgment.

You cannot verify the identity of the reviewers on Glassdoor. But you can stop yourself from rejecting a job opportunity or a company solely based on negative reviews. Instead of letting other's opinions cloud your judgment, it's always good to explore for yourself and then arrive at a decision. In other words, make decisions based on facts and not assumptions. A prior connection or a former colleague who works for the organization you are about to start working for can give their perspective. However, you must always do your due diligence and make the best guess before making your career decisions.

Do you know why such websites thrive and succeed? They always take advantage of your quest to find the workplace of your dreams. Firstly, you have to let go of the idea of a dream workplace. There is no such thing. Take the time and effort to make wise choices, and never assume you can find the best workplace ever by just relying on Glassdoor reviews.

My pandemic diary

I think 2020 will go down the history as the worst year we have ever had. The challenges at work, the fear of economic recession, and the staggering rise in unemployment left far-reaching physical and mental health consequences that are not easy to undo. In other words, it is not easy to navigate the tumult that COVID-19 has brought upon us. In addition to the enormous loss of human lives, job losses continue to rise at a staggering rate every day.

More than a year has passed since WHO declared the COVID-19 pandemic. It has upended our lives and careers like never before. We abruptly shifted to working from home and lived through several lockdowns. Face-to-face interactions and social gatherings are a thing of the past now, and staying at home and working from home is the new normal. The ongoing restrictions and devastating socio-economic impacts have left most of us feeling stressed and worried about our future, and I am no exception.  With another lockdown on the horizon, I cannot help but think about how I will work, live, and thrive until the surge abates or until vaccines are available equitably around the world.

The pandemic has rocked and halted my regular life like never before. It is still challenging me in unpredictable ways every day. I don't know when my life will get back to the pre-virus normal. Or, will the old normal ever appear again? I don't know. 

The pandemic is a severe assault on both my mental health. The feeling of loneliness struck hard every day throughout 2020, especially during festive seasons and on my birthday. I was hoping that 2021 will be a better year. But the second wave of COVID-19 has taken my anxiety and loneliness to the next level. I know that everyone goes through tough times when disconnected. I think it is normal to feel lonely while staying indoors and interacting less with people, but for me, loneliness worsens the underlying anxiety and panic. 

I was ashamed and embarrassed to open up and talk about the pernicious side effect of the pandemics until now. I feared that a candid conversation might uncover a vulnerability on my part. However, since my mental health and well-being is as important as my physical health, I have decided to jot down my fears and thoughts here. Once I pour out my fears and worries,  I want to embrace and live a healthy lifestyle and stay clear in my head.

On weekdays or weekends, staying up late and waking up late is the new normal in my life since March 2020. My eating habits have gone for a toss, and the prolonged pandemic restrictions and a sedentary lifestyle have made me a couch potato. Adding to the woes is my latest indulgence - munching on unhealthy snacks while at work or whenever I am hungry. And the temptation to stress eat is undoubtedly enormous these days. To get started, I have to painstakingly combat all these bad habits before they wreak havoc on my health, productivity, and immunity.

The good news is that with adequate attention and practice, I can successfully undo any less-than-stellar habits of mine, and I have succeeded more than once in the past.  But I haven't been successful yet when it comes to keeping a check on my news consumption. 

I love to stay on top of news and trends and enjoy devouring breaking news and updates every other minute. But it's high time to try hard and draw the line while staying informed and alert. With one distressing news report leading to another, I often get lost on the internet for hours together. The information overload gets quite overwhelming on most of the days and often gives fatigue and anxiety. I know that I cannot stay away from news portals and social media for a very long time. It is not a viable solution. I will have to slow down, limit my presence, and take one step at a time. 

During the initial lockdown, the prolonged lack of human interactions made me a compulsive social media user for some time until I started witnessing a startling overflow of anxiety-inducing misinformation. Then I decided to take frequent breaks from social media instead of constantly letting myself go down the rabbit hole of social media addiction. I found the much-needed diversion in reading, music, and blog writing. Pandemic or not, I always find solace in good books and blogging. They help reduce negative mental chatter significantly so that I can stay calm, focused, and motivated. 

The inundation of the COVID-19 infodemic on social media and chat apps and its negative implications have reinforced the need to have an optimal balance between my digital and non-digital life. Social media can sometimes be a double-edged sword. Forget Facebook and Twitter; the rate at which dubious and false information about the pandemic is spreading on WhatsApp is very alarming. Like the COVID-19 virus, misinformation spreading like wildfire on WhatsApp, and we must stem the tide before it is too late. But trust me, life without WhatsApp is very much possible, way more peaceful, and entirely possible. I live it every single day and love it to the fullest.

To get through the  COVID-19 upheaval without any lasting physical, mental, and emotional damage, I want to live healthily and keep my positive attitude, energy, and hope alive. Yes, sometimes it's hard to sail through certain days, but I am trying to take one day at a time and focus on the positives in my life. That's the only way I can march forward with good health, determination, hope.

Why I don’t vote

I live in a democratic country. But unlike many of my fellow citizens, I don't vote. I always skip the elections. It is neither out of laziness or apathy nor to be proud of a unique decision. Distrust and disillusionment top the list of reasons why I haven't voted so far (and probably will never). 

For starters, politicians are experts in inaction and breaking their promises once elected. And it is not just about broken promises. Almost one-third of the elected candidates in our country have criminal charges against them. Also, corruption is rampant, growing at an alarming pace, and is largely unchecked. I am tired of hearing blatant lies and hollow promises.  Frustration mounts like a wave every time I hear about complacency and lack of transparency. A wave of sadness chokes me every time I hear about increasing crimes and decreasing conviction rates. 

Politicians are shamelessly insincere about their campaign pledges. They promise the world during campaigns, but as we know, they never fulfil the promises. If I cannot trust them to keep their promises, why should I vote? In other words, politics has now become “politricks”, and I do not want to trick my soul. According to the law of the land, commoners like you and me must be responsible for our decisions and accountable for our actions. But, when a citizen becomes a politician, this rule often goes out of the window.

Do you know the reason why our politicians get away with inaction and unfulfilled promises? There are no checks and balances to assess their works during or after their tenure. Thus, broken promises and voters’ discontent have become so common these days that we have almost forgotten what it feels like when an elected politician keeps promises. Most of the politicians live for themselves. They live under the umbrella of selflessness and are always hungry for power and privileges. This is why many people in our country do not feel represented by the candidates they elect. I am no different, but I will not spend my time looking for the "lesser evil".

I am eligible to vote, but I decided not to when I was eighteen. For me, the election is just a once-in-five years exercise. I stay home during the day of voting and live my life, and I have no plans to change my decision. From good roads to streetlights, traffic signals, drinking water, and the safety of women and children, none of the necessities is provided equally to the citizens across the country. For me, voting is an act of hope. If people still die of hunger, worms wriggle in our drinking water, fatal accidents happen due to potholes, and babies as young as 28 days get raped, why should I spend my time electing a selfish bunch of power mongers?

Now, the question is more pertinent than ever. We are battling an unprecedented crisis, and the explosion of COVID-19 cases is taking a toll on everyone, including our frontline warriors. Despite receiving warning signs of the new wave and the new variants, our elected representatives failed to take adequate steps to mitigate the spread and the second wave. Religious gatherings and elections aggravated the surge, and the complacency is costing us heavily now. 

Most of the politicians took to social media and urged people to vote even amid the pandemic. Voters thronged to polling sites and created breeding grounds for the virus. Due to the mass flouting of COVID norms during elections, COVID is now ravaging our country harder than ever.  People are gasping for breath and battling for life, and hospitals do not have adequate beds and medical oxygen supply. But our politicians are focusing more on blame games instead of helping the people out there. 

Yes, I cannot understand why I should do my civic duties in a country where the elected representatives fail to provide even hospital beds, medicines, and medical oxygen. If they do not have an iota of concern about us and our well-being, why should I spend an hour in front of the polling booth to do my civic duty? My life and time are as precious as those of the politicians out there.

As far as I know, there are no legal remedies to pursue if a politician breaks a promise or fails to perform the fundamental duties. Lack of legal obligation is the main reason why errant, selfish, and irresponsible politicians get away with unfulfilled promises, wrongdoings, and inaction. Forget legal remedies; the crisis of accountability is rampant among politicians. Furthermore, voluntary resignation admitting responsibility of failure to discharge duties as an elected representative is unheard of in our country. Is there anything left for a voter to expect?

Let me tell you about a one-on-one interaction with a municipal election candidate. This incident happened several years ago, but it continues to remain etched in my mind. The candidate was at my doorstep, in deep conversation with my dad. When he saw me standing near the door, he told me that I should take a day off and cast my vote for him. My reply was simple – I asked him if he can ensure good streetlights, round the clock safety and proper waste disposal. His reply was a sarcastic smile that spoke a thousand words that echoed his lack of interest in my request. He walked away, and I stood there reaffirming my decision not to vote.

Why I didn't speak up

It takes a lot of time and effort to land a job interview, and it gets a lot more difficult during the coronavirus pandemic. I attended an interview yesterday, and I was super excited about it.  Everything was hunky-dory until the hiring manager dared to make a comment with sexual innuendo. Yes, he said that during a Zoom call while the owner of the company, a woman, was listening to the entire conversation. In the garb of a joke, what he said in Malayalam, our mother tongue, was downright offensive and sexual in every possible way. Then he laughed off as if the comment was far from demeaning. The owner, a non-Malayalee, couldn’t decipher that his comment was gross and disgusting. She dismissed it as a causal joke.

I couldn't. I was shocked and was not in a position to talk. It took a few seconds for me to gather my thoughts and mumble out a reply. After the call, I spoke to the owner of the company and politely declined the opportunity.

But the incident got me thinking. Should I have done it differently? But then again, I cannot even imagine working with a man who unapologetically makes sexual comments at work. Should I have called him out? I wanted to, but I focused more on ending the conversation without being rude, disrespectful, or unprofessional. Yes, I chose silence instead of career suicide, shaming, and depression. Many women like me face such experiences in silence to keep career wheels running on the track. I know I should not have done that, but I did not want to put my career on the line. 

Why do we suffer in silence? Why do we let harassers get away with what they do to us? I think it is due to our innate fear of not wanting to be branded as “troublemaker”. Another reason is the fear of losing potential career opportunities. We also dread the possibilities of character assassination. Even if we muster the courage to speak up and take a strong stand, our words either fall on deaf ears or we are told not to make a "fuss" about "it". It is sad that harassers always get defensive and justify their actions, and those who rally around to support them will jump in and pronounce the verdict that the women who complained are "overreacting" or might have "misunderstood" the men in question. Or worse, together they ostracize and penalize women who are bold enough to stand up against what is wrong.

I wanted to stand up for myself and give a piece of my mind to the man who humiliated me. But I took a step back and told myself to let go. Apart from shaming and psychological trauma, I was afraid of retaliation as well. I was facing a man who is way up on the hierarchy ladder and has power and authority at his disposal. It means standing up for myself or going public will disrupt my life in unimaginable ways. I have to earn my bread and butter and support my family. So, I chose my career over my self-respect; and to avoid bad blood, I hid in the garb of silence. You may disagree with me and the way I rationalize my silence, but I also know that no one will support me if I dare to speak out. 

When the offender holds a high job status than me, silence will help safeguard the career I built up with years of sweat and blood. Yes, the price of speaking up can be high. So, I could not speak up, or I chose not to speak up. Instead, I chose my blog as a cathartic outlet to jot down my experience. This honest and unreserved account of what I went through is my way of unburdening the shame and anger that I've been carrying for the last few days.

As long as men dominate the positions of power and women like me live with the fear of being at the receiving end of backlash, I think silence is the best way to stay afloat peacefully. As we all know, the corporate world is a male terrain. So why invite trouble by speaking up when one can choose stay silent, walk away, and let karma do it's thing?

Love without expectations

I met someone.

We had feelings for each other.

As the feelings got stronger, we got into a relationship.

The relationship turned into love and got immensely serious.

We loved each other like dew’s love for parched leaves.

Until…

Expectations uprooted whatever we had between us.

And we parted ways to never meet again.

Have you been there, done that, and wished you hadn't? If so, you and I made the same mistake - We believed that love is a two-way street. We always carried the misguided belief that it is ok to have expectations in love. That’s exactly where we were wrong. 

So, together let’s correct that mistake. Before we go any further, let me ask you this simple question - Is love a one-way street/a two-way street? If you are wondering why I asked the question, here is the answer – Now, I think love is/should be a one-way street. 

Let me explain why. When you start expecting reciprocity, or has a slew of expectations, you will always expect the other person to live up to them. And at some point, if that person lets you down or leaves you, your world comes crashing down on you. That's exactly how you will feel until you muster the strength and positivity to move on. Trust me, I’ve been there, and that is the worst feeling ever. In every love story that turns cold over time, the culprit is almost always the expectations that partners have of each other.  You start knowing you partner, get intimate, and walk hand in hand along the path towards fulfilling love; yes, expectations can obviously happen. When those expectations aren’t met, you get heartbroken. 

Expectations make you feel entrapped, and pain becomes the new normal, because you always expect your partner to say/do certain things, but he/she may fail at times. What if you deliberately avoid keeping any expectations? Unlike the common perception, selflessness and living without expectations is not a tightrope walk where there is always the risk of slipping or falling. It’s all about having the will and confidence to love with the strong belief that you have nothing to lose when you love someone without expecting anything in return.  If you can do that, you will stop ruminating on reciprocity. You will be more mindful and will learn to live in the moment. 

They say love happens when two people feel the same way. For me, love can happen even if the feeling is one-sided. Here is the caveat – Do not expect anything return, be it love or friendship. You love someone because you want to, and that’s a conscious choice you make. Despite all the flaws, you love him/her every single day, because you want to. However, the problem arises when you are hell-bent on wanting the same amount of love in return, or you want to end up with the person you choose to love.  If the other person fails to reciprocate the same feelings, you will feel angry and betrayed. 

The question here is, who is the reason behind the pain and agony? It’s you. Let’s look at it objectively. You entered the relationship with a long checklist. Without knowing what your partner’s feelings are, you kept yearning for his/her time, affection, comfort, support, and undivided attention. In other words, you entered the relationship with a clear agenda in mind.

Does that mean wanting all of these is bad, or wanting to be loved, is wrong. I am not saying it is wrong, in fact, the desire to be loved is quite natural. However, when it becomes contractual, and when both partners have a slew of agendas, things can become very problematic. You end up bargaining, and you end up losing each other. 

Does that mean one should fail to draw boundaries, settle for being used and unloved, and let the other person take all intimate benefits? No, absolutely not! While you try to establish a special and selfless relationship that is free from selfishness and possessiveness of any sort, protect yourself from being exploited. Make sure that your relationship is healthy and is built on mutual respect. This will help protect yourself from pain and loss of self-esteem and sanity. 

When it comes to figuring out if someone is using you, or is emotionally manipulative, here is my advice - always trust your instincts, because those are messages that come straightaway from your soul.  If you do not want to be near that person, do not dwell too much on it, instead cut them out of your life completely. However, that should not rob you of the ability to love without any expectations. Less expectations =  less disappointments and more peace of mind.

Do not expect a relationship to happen; if it works out, perfect, if not, move on! After all, we only have one life to live. There is no pause or rewind button.

The dangers of keyword stuffing

When it comes to writing content and optimizing it for both search engines and visitors, it is always tempting to take shortcuts. You may want to publish content and get the best ranking overnight and will think about speeding up content writing and optimization by bypassing Google’s guidelines. Will that help you? Absolutely not! This is the most important lesson that I learned when I started working as a content writer in 2008. Among the (in)famous black-hat methods that are popularly used by writers and self-proclaimed SEO experts out there, keyword stuffing is what hurts the most.  Let me explain what keyword stuffing is. Some writers believe that shoving most searched keywords onto a webpage is the easiest way to rank higher for those terms in search engine results. This is strictly a black hat tactic and leads to the utmost terrible user experience. Let’s think logically about this – Who will read a webpage where the writer has used “affordable web design” or “best seo agency” multiple times on the same page? 

Imagine getting crammed inside a minivan. How will that feel like? That’s exactly how I feel when I read keyword-stuffed content. Keyword stuffing not only affects user experience, it may knock off a website from search engine rankings, or worse, the site will soon be removed from search results completely. It would also lead to search engine penalty. In short, keyword stuffing a very dangerous game, and I wonder why many writers continue to rely on this misguided logic when it comes to writing and optimizing content for search engines. Today, I was reading the blog about coworking spaces and why they are popular. All that I could notice in the content was barrage of so-called “searchable” keywords, right from top to bottom. There was hardly any useful information in the blog. I stopped midway through the blog, gave up, and left the website. However, all I could think about was the alarming rate at which their bounce rate would skyrocket each day. Do you know why? Search engine algorithms are designed to pick good quality content that connects with audience. Visitors should be able to find what exactly they are looking for. In other words, the algorithms pick only interesting, plagiarism-free, and informative content. If your content is not written for human audience, it completely goes against the best practices of writing and SEO. It will not get ranked for sure. To put it precisely, the content will be considered as spam and will not get the attention of visitors. When you create poor user experience and send visitors away, your bounce rate will increase, and the conversion rate will dip each day. This will leave a bad impact on your online presence. Even if a writer manages to garner good search engine ranking with keyword stuffing, will a visitor read the content or stay on the site? No! The content will repel people almost immediately. 

There are two ways of keyword stuffing: natural and unnatural. The former is the unnatural way of repeating keyword several times out of context. The latter is a little trickier. Some writers know very well that they should not hinder user experience. Hence, they camouflage spammy text stuffed with keywords. But they cannot hide spammy content from search engine crawlers. This attempt to fool search engine algorithms will only result in penalty. Here is what I am not able to understand - Why go that extra mile and deceive search engines when you can use that time wisely to write good content? So, here is the most pertinent question. Does that mean the use of keywords is bad? No! Keywords are important, but writers should focus on creating information-rich content and use keywords appropriately. Topic, information, and context are equally important when it comes to the selection and usage of keywords.  Instead of focusing on search engine robots, writers should focus on the people who read the content. They visit webpages and invest their time to find informative content. Hence writers should use keywords responsibly and in the utmost well-to-do manner. I don’t believe in the magic number or percentage of keywords that can be used on each webpage. It’s all about using your logic and thinking from a reader’s point of view. I think long-tail keywords are better than short keywords. An alternative is to try and use appropriate synonyms without overdoing. Most importantly, you don’t have to use any shortcuts, or be a grammar Nazi or expert in keywords, to write interesting and informative content.  All it takes is comprehensive research and a clear understanding of what you are planning to write. Once you are ready, you will soon reach the zone to write, and words will start flowing very soon. 

For me, keywords are like salt – adequate quantity will bring out the best, whereas too much will soon ruin everything. 

Rape jokes aren't funny

Metaphors and analogies – we use them a lot every day in our conversations. When we use the right ones at the right time in the right way, they help communicate easily and add clarity and precision. When it comes to clear and meaningful communication, metaphors and analogies are almost hard to beat. There is nothing wrong with metaphors and analogies, by all means, but some of them are distasteful, clumsy, and sickening. Let me give you an example - Some people use the word "rape" to callously to refer to something bad, or they draw parallels between “rape” and anything and everything bad or inconvenient. 

When the word "rape" is flippantly used, it trivializes the real-life experience of rape survivors across the world. Remember how the world cracked up to the ‘balatkar’ joke in “3 Idiots”? It reeked of misogyny and sexism, but it never raised any eyebrows back then.  Cracking such jokes have become the new normal these days, and this MUST stop. In NO contexts can such things be said. Yet, even now, they find their way through the conversations of some people out there.

It is a pity that some people still find it hard to understand why rape jokes and metaphors are a no-no. Rape is a horrendous crime. We should not trivialize it with such metaphors and analogies and disregard the physical and mental trauma that the survivors go through. And if one is saying, "I have the right to free speech!",  that person should take a moment to gauge the impact of that joke on a sexual assault survivor. When rape jokes and metaphors become a part of day-to-day conversations, listeners get conditioned to ignore and normalize sexual assaults. Such conversations perpetuate rape culture and defend the behavior of the abuser as ‘normal’ and ‘regular’. Can we let that happen? NO, we cannot! When someone draws attention to this sexist behavior, the world around feels that he/she is blowing things out of proportion. 

A few months back, an actor who prides herself of being self-made and claims to have a voice of her own made an appalling statement on national television. She compared the demolition of her office space to being raped, and said: “I felt like I was raped, I felt violated mentally and psychologically.” Is it right to proffer an argument and find justification by drawing such analogies? No matter how grievous her pain is, it is never right to compare it with a horrific and heinous crime like rape. We have seen many other instances where both the well-known and the not-so-well-known have used the rape jokes and metaphors to make their point. A so-called superstar once compared his strenuous shooting experience to the condition of a "raped woman". How can they simply belittle the extent and danger of this crime? I am still not able to wrap my head around this. When they try to draw distasteful comparisons between a difficult situation they have been through and a horrendous crime like rape, they are making a mockery of every woman, man, and child who has been a victim of this horrifying and unpardonable crime.  Such analogies and metaphors dial down the intensity and criminality of the crime. They also make the victims hesitant to opening up or seeking help. 

According to the National Crimes Records Bureau (NCRB), India recorded 88 rape cases every day in 2019. 2020 is no different. Hardly a day goes by without reading news reports on rape sexual violence against women and children. Yet, some people irresponsibly use rape analogies and jokes now and then to prove their points. It is high time to raise our collective voices against the use of rape jokes and metaphors. We should stop this right away!