Can things be fine and dandy in life if you are ‘fair’ skinned?

I laughed my lungs out when one of my friends said that he rejected a marriage proposal just because the girl is not fair enough to match with his ‘paleness’. Yes I mean ‘paleness’ for the so called ‘fairness’ that many people around us are obsessed with. What else can describe best this unhealthy obsession for fairness, of which my friend unfortunately is mad with? Typical Indian man! I grumbled and left the place soon, but couldn’t stop thinking about it. How silly of him to put such a stupid reason to reject a girl! However it’s not just he, but the entire society is obsessive about using fairness as the yard stick to gauge the beauty of women, where dark-skinned men symbolized as idols of ‘manliness’ and handsomeness. Here it’s too ironic to see the society making a whole turn round for men.A society that considers fair skin as the benchmark of beauty can never be seen anywhere else than India, the country which guarantees equality for all. One can seldom notice such discrimination among the westerners. I have seen many American guys living happily with black women. But here a fair guy can’t easily accept a dark skinned girl.

Recently I happened to read an article where a beautician is quoted that she couldn’t stop herself from being surprised when a school girl, hardly twelve or thirteen, came to her parlor asking if skin whitening treatments are available. This incident alone can tell us a lot about the ‘unhealthy fairness fetish’ that we still have.

Parents and other family members should make conscious effort not to compare kids and create a feeling that they are biased towards the ‘fairer’ one because the sidelining often starts here. I have heard that difference in skin color cause sibling rivalry. There can be people out there who get mentally hurt when his/her sibling gets more attention just because he/she is fair. This would lead to uncontrollable anger, jealousy and vengeance towards the fairer one, and at times end up tragically. This is possibly due to the sidelining of the dark or tan skinned.

During functions and get together, many go for ‘comparison games’, of the dark skinned to the fairer one. This would kindle up lot of negatives in the mind of the former, which ultimately reduces his/her confidence, and self-esteem, making them go for loner life, by moving away from the society, just because of an inferiority complex that they can’t be fairer like others.

It has become a passion of today to fair oneself in all means and levels. Many jumps from one fairness product to the other, hoping the new one will make them fairer than ever before, and finally ending up in a tone worse than before. Can things be fine and dandy in life, if one is ‘fair’ skinned? Should fairness be the benchmark to judge someone? Good looks are essential, but that doesn’t define the real person. Haven’t we all heard that looks can often be deceptive? Then how fair it is to judge someone on fairness!

Coming back to my friend, he still looks for a ‘fairer’ girl than a fair partner!

When I put an end to my Compulsive Social Networking ‘Mania’

Should I call it a mania? Better you guys decide after reading this!

One fine day I woke up with a strange idea, and that was to deactivate my Facebook account for some time. I had no plans to hop-off the social network bandwagon, but really wanted a ‘normal’ life for myself for a few days, and wanted to start-off blogging and reading again, along with spending some time for some other things in life that I had almost forgotten for quite some time. The idea to shut-down the doors to social networking was due to the kind of compulsive social networking mania that I had for quite a long time, which took away my keenness in other things like reading and writing. I kind of felt a sense of guilt seeing my blog one day, and wanted to take up writing seriously and start off again with some good blog posts.

Facebook had almost taken away a good amount of hours from my post-work time, and I was all in to uploading pictures, writing on walls, adding friends, and trying all the possible stuffs that I could do on Facebook, kind of literally hooked-on to it. After buying a mobile with in-built Facebook settings, things went from bad to worse that I had to literally stop me soon from going on more towards the craziness of Facebooking. Given that all my friends from are permanently signed into Facebook, I was all caught up in Facebook obsession and never bothered to realize the ‘social-media fatigue’ taking a toll on my mind and body. High-time to put a full stop, and I did it!

After 1 month of hibernation, I logged in to my account to check if I had lost my craziness, and luckily I was no longer madder after social networking. And by that time I had almost lost my ‘compulsive Facebooking’ and had started off my blogging and reading again. Now I login to my account less frequently than before, and don’t go for stuffs other than what’s really needed, literally maintaining a low profile.

During the one month that I vanished from Facebook, people kept asking me where I disappeared and called me crazy. But I'm glad that I took the right decision at the right time. Now I have more time to write and read, interact with people, do creative and useful stuffs, and even go to bed early. Now I also do so many things good for my body and mind.

I don’t know if this happens to everyone out there, but I am sure that at least a few people who read this blog would agree with me that social networking websites somehow take away a good amount of time from our days, making us more and more sedentary, entangling us in the world of World Wide Web. If you all start giving a serious thought about the time that you guys spend on social networking websites, I am sure you all are going to get shocked seeing the result.