Too serious to handle

How good are you in handling people who are too silent and serious all the time, and can’t handle even a joke? Being moderately serious is almost excusable, but, it’s too awful to be in the company of people who are masters of the artless art of spreading glumness through unnecessary seriousness. Be in their presence for a moment and they would soon cover your surroundings with a dreadful shadow, as they always have the immense capability of draining out the vigor and cheeriness of people in their proximity. I've experienced this many times in my life, so if you ask me, I would say I am not big-hearted enough to handle them and the huge amount of ‘heaviness’ that they forcefully share with others. What keeps me wondering is the reason why they put-in the mask of seriousness all day long and suck the life out of others? I do agree that life has lots of tough situations, and everyone has their share of happiness and sadness in life, but this in no way means one has to be dead serious all the time. In spite of all the bad situations that we have, life is never biased and has equal share of happiness for everyone, but putting in serious faces and indulging in serious thoughts would do no good and would sneakily veil the share of happiness that we are gifted with, thus making us view only the serious and sadder part of life.

If you really don’t want to drain-away the happiness in your mind and feel exhausted and depressed, I would say it’s always better to diplomatically and tactfully avoid people who are blessed enough to inflate even the lightest day today situations, and make them as heaviest as possible.  Just run away from them before they take hold of your mind, and inject-in the ‘fatally poisonous’ seriousness and numbness that they always carry, and are too generous to share with others. Be it a person or a topic, I carefully try and avoid the unscrupulous exploitation or kind of vampirism that these people indulge in, with their numb presence and sober, grumpy talks, thus making others instinctively feel unsafe, anxious, and depressed. I used to think that I can give my best smile and remain completely detached from such people and their talks, but unfortunately, some are too immune to my smile therapy and I miserably fail, thus desperately looking for the best possible way to get-away.

Many people do have this misconception that looking dead serious is the sign of intelligence and sensibility.  They are utterly wrong and I am sure they would never know about how the really intelligent people take-up life with ease and lightness that would lighten the mind and help it release some clearer and vivid thoughts that can initiate a bunch of sensible actions to make life worth living.

Serious people and their burdened minds can change only if they voluntarily change their attitude towards life and people around.   Or else, they would never ever taste the better side of life, and would end up living a numb life filled in with serious thoughts, right from the minute they get up, until they go to bed.

Be patient, be happy

Anger has always given me hard times, by poking its dirty long nose unexpectedly at many situations in my life. This is no way means I am a short tempered person who would get angry even for the slightest possible reason that I can find out. Yes, I annoyed at times, but only for those genuine reasons that I can best explain, and one among them is the scornful remarks of those who are keen on digging-out my mistakes, purposefully overlooking the umpteen things they I am good in. But I will soon get-over this and will move on, as I am tired freaking out at such people and really don’t want to be affected by their venomous remarks.

I used to get badly irritated when people deliberately pointed out the negatives in me or my works, purposefully avoiding all the positives. This irritated more when I used to put in hours of hard work and patience in to what I assigned to do, only to find that they all go unnoticed, and only that slightest & accidental error from my end is getting highlighted in front of others. Even though I very well know that no one can be perfect in life and do thing flawlessly, it’s too devastating to hear people reiterate the negatives non-stop, while purposefully forgetting the umpteen positives. I think I can site so many situations of this kind, which has happened in my professional as well as personal life, where I had been so desperate to explain how much dedicated I was and the amount of hard work that I had put-in to make things as perfect as possible. All in vain! Some people around say I do have a bad inferiority complex and that I should pluck it out from my mind very soon, before it ruins me. But I know I am not inferior, and have strong faith in me and my capabilities. All that I can’t stand is people who lack the ability to find positives in me and my works.

Now, I am slowly trying to stop giving those frantic replies, and wait for my turn to calmly explain my end. Yes, with age comes wisdom, and I am learning the wiser ways that are working wonders these days. After the best efforts to explain my part, I deliberately make sure not to worry if the hearer is not satisfied, and make my mind understand that I've done my part in the best possible way.  Fortunately I am having many more stress-free experiences that before dealing with those unhappy ones around who are keen on numbering what went wrong rather than looking at what all went right.

From my experience, I would say it’s always better to stop being frenetic, as I've understood that there is a majority out there who are ‘blessed’ enough to remember negative things more strongly and in more detail. Yes, they do irritate me, but I try not to get annoyed like before! Why bother to mess with them when I know what I am capable of?

Pointing out someone’s negative side is not at all a bad practice, if people are generous enough to balance it with equal amount of positives, thus helping the person boost his ability work more on his capabilities. But if a review is one-sided and biased, containing only a list of negatives, I am sure it would do no good to anyone, not only to me, but also to others, and will in turn take away the enthusiasm and vigor of the hearer.