Why I don’t vote

I live in a democratic country. But unlike many of my fellow citizens, I don't vote. I always skip the elections. It is neither out of laziness or apathy nor to be proud of a unique decision. Distrust and disillusionment top the list of reasons why I haven't voted so far (and probably will never). 

For starters, politicians are experts in inaction and breaking their promises once elected. And it is not just about broken promises. Almost one-third of the elected candidates in our country have criminal charges against them. Also, corruption is rampant, growing at an alarming pace, and is largely unchecked. I am tired of hearing blatant lies and hollow promises.  Frustration mounts like a wave every time I hear about complacency and lack of transparency. A wave of sadness chokes me every time I hear about increasing crimes and decreasing conviction rates. 

Politicians are shamelessly insincere about their campaign pledges. They promise the world during campaigns, but as we know, they never fulfil the promises. If I cannot trust them to keep their promises, why should I vote? In other words, politics has now become “politricks”, and I do not want to trick my soul. According to the law of the land, commoners like you and me must be responsible for our decisions and accountable for our actions. But, when a citizen becomes a politician, this rule often goes out of the window.

Do you know the reason why our politicians get away with inaction and unfulfilled promises? There are no checks and balances to assess their works during or after their tenure. Thus, broken promises and voters’ discontent have become so common these days that we have almost forgotten what it feels like when an elected politician keeps promises. Most of the politicians live for themselves. They live under the umbrella of selflessness and are always hungry for power and privileges. This is why many people in our country do not feel represented by the candidates they elect. I am no different, but I will not spend my time looking for the "lesser evil".

I am eligible to vote, but I decided not to when I was eighteen. For me, the election is just a once-in-five years exercise. I stay home during the day of voting and live my life, and I have no plans to change my decision. From good roads to streetlights, traffic signals, drinking water, and the safety of women and children, none of the necessities is provided equally to the citizens across the country. For me, voting is an act of hope. If people still die of hunger, worms wriggle in our drinking water, fatal accidents happen due to potholes, and babies as young as 28 days get raped, why should I spend my time electing a selfish bunch of power mongers?

Now, the question is more pertinent than ever. We are battling an unprecedented crisis, and the explosion of COVID-19 cases is taking a toll on everyone, including our frontline warriors. Despite receiving warning signs of the new wave and the new variants, our elected representatives failed to take adequate steps to mitigate the spread and the second wave. Religious gatherings and elections aggravated the surge, and the complacency is costing us heavily now. 

Most of the politicians took to social media and urged people to vote even amid the pandemic. Voters thronged to polling sites and created breeding grounds for the virus. Due to the mass flouting of COVID norms during elections, COVID is now ravaging our country harder than ever.  People are gasping for breath and battling for life, and hospitals do not have adequate beds and medical oxygen supply. But our politicians are focusing more on blame games instead of helping the people out there. 

Yes, I cannot understand why I should do my civic duties in a country where the elected representatives fail to provide even hospital beds, medicines, and medical oxygen. If they do not have an iota of concern about us and our well-being, why should I spend an hour in front of the polling booth to do my civic duty? My life and time are as precious as those of the politicians out there.

As far as I know, there are no legal remedies to pursue if a politician breaks a promise or fails to perform the fundamental duties. Lack of legal obligation is the main reason why errant, selfish, and irresponsible politicians get away with unfulfilled promises, wrongdoings, and inaction. Forget legal remedies; the crisis of accountability is rampant among politicians. Furthermore, voluntary resignation admitting responsibility of failure to discharge duties as an elected representative is unheard of in our country. Is there anything left for a voter to expect?

Let me tell you about a one-on-one interaction with a municipal election candidate. This incident happened several years ago, but it continues to remain etched in my mind. The candidate was at my doorstep, in deep conversation with my dad. When he saw me standing near the door, he told me that I should take a day off and cast my vote for him. My reply was simple – I asked him if he can ensure good streetlights, round the clock safety and proper waste disposal. His reply was a sarcastic smile that spoke a thousand words that echoed his lack of interest in my request. He walked away, and I stood there reaffirming my decision not to vote.

Why I didn't speak up

It takes a lot of time and effort to land a job interview, and it gets a lot more difficult during the coronavirus pandemic. I attended an interview yesterday, and I was super excited about it.  Everything was hunky-dory until the hiring manager dared to make a comment with sexual innuendo. Yes, he said that during a Zoom call while the owner of the company, a woman, was listening to the entire conversation. In the garb of a joke, what he said in Malayalam, our mother tongue, was downright offensive and sexual in every possible way. Then he laughed off as if the comment was far from demeaning. The owner, a non-Malayalee, couldn’t decipher that his comment was gross and disgusting. She dismissed it as a causal joke.

I couldn't. I was shocked and was not in a position to talk. It took a few seconds for me to gather my thoughts and mumble out a reply. After the call, I spoke to the owner of the company and politely declined the opportunity.

But the incident got me thinking. Should I have done it differently? But then again, I cannot even imagine working with a man who unapologetically makes sexual comments at work. Should I have called him out? I wanted to, but I focused more on ending the conversation without being rude, disrespectful, or unprofessional. Yes, I chose silence instead of career suicide, shaming, and depression. Many women like me face such experiences in silence to keep career wheels running on the track. I know I should not have done that, but I did not want to put my career on the line. 

Why do we suffer in silence? Why do we let harassers get away with what they do to us? I think it is due to our innate fear of not wanting to be branded as “troublemaker”. Another reason is the fear of losing potential career opportunities. We also dread the possibilities of character assassination. Even if we muster the courage to speak up and take a strong stand, our words either fall on deaf ears or we are told not to make a "fuss" about "it". It is sad that harassers always get defensive and justify their actions, and those who rally around to support them will jump in and pronounce the verdict that the women who complained are "overreacting" or might have "misunderstood" the men in question. Or worse, together they ostracize and penalize women who are bold enough to stand up against what is wrong.

I wanted to stand up for myself and give a piece of my mind to the man who humiliated me. But I took a step back and told myself to let go. Apart from shaming and psychological trauma, I was afraid of retaliation as well. I was facing a man who is way up on the hierarchy ladder and has power and authority at his disposal. It means standing up for myself or going public will disrupt my life in unimaginable ways. I have to earn my bread and butter and support my family. So, I chose my career over my self-respect; and to avoid bad blood, I hid in the garb of silence. You may disagree with me and the way I rationalize my silence, but I also know that no one will support me if I dare to speak out. 

When the offender holds a high job status than me, silence will help safeguard the career I built up with years of sweat and blood. Yes, the price of speaking up can be high. So, I could not speak up, or I chose not to speak up. Instead, I chose my blog as a cathartic outlet to jot down my experience. This honest and unreserved account of what I went through is my way of unburdening the shame and anger that I've been carrying for the last few days.

As long as men dominate the positions of power and women like me live with the fear of being at the receiving end of backlash, I think silence is the best way to stay afloat peacefully. As we all know, the corporate world is a male terrain. So why invite trouble by speaking up when one can choose stay silent, walk away, and let karma do it's thing?